Ocean

I only see what I want to see…

Am I actual seeing?

I only hear what I want to hear…..

Am I actually hearing?

I only feel what I want to feel….

Am I actually feeling?

I only go where I want to go….

Am I actually living?

 

We are all waves that only cover centimeters of sand,

We are all sand that only covers inches of land,

We are all land that only stands so far under so little of the setting sun,

Our understanding is really a relative hallucination…

 

And I find myself at war with my senses from time to time,

Because I cut out my eyes and I only see the shore and not the ocean,

I cut off my ears and I only hear the quicksand below me,

I cut off my hands to ensure I never will touch the sky,

My senses call an armistice a brief reprieve,

I know if I opened my mind and let them win I could really see… feel… taste… and hear…

Everything….

 

But I…..

Only see what I want to see…

Am I actual seeing?

I only hear what I want to hear…..

Am I actually hearing?

I only feel what I want to feel….

Am I actually feeling?

I only go where I want to go….

Am I actually living?

 

My heart is a wall that keeps out the people that might want to cross the border and come inside of me,

My heart is an orchestra, but I only give it two broken strings,

My heart is a refugee trapped in a prison cell,

My heart is a heaven trapped inside my relative hell…..

 

How do I open my heart?

When my heart only exists inside of me?

How do I give other people light?

When I go blind if I stare at the sun?

How can I be…

Everything to anyone but me….

 

If I only see what I want to see?
If I only hear what I want to hear?

If I only feel what I want to feel?

If I only go where I want to go?

If my heart is closed up and sewn?

If I’m a dog tied up on a leash?

If I’m a bird buried in tea leaves?

If I’m a God that only operates on rest days?

If my impact will only last until I’m put in a grave?

 

I only feel what I want to feel,

But maybe if they listened to what I felt,

They would stop and feel for people other than themselves,

But the wind is whistling a violent tune,

Sounds like fascism, the kind that puts the innocent in tombs,

And the sun is blinding them, making them short sighted enough to cite their hallucinations that are so grim,

They are at war with themselves and they will be at war with you and I,

Because if we don’t open all of our eyes,

We might just fucking die.

 

Because they only see what they want to see,

They are just like you and me,

They only hear what they want to hear,

Fictions that made that trail full of tears,

They only hold what they want to hold dear,

They only live off fear,

And maybe if they realized that relatively isn’t a gospel written in stone,

Then they would stop throwing their stones,

They would realize they were not alone…

 

Because I’ve realized the first part of being free,

Is realizing that you are the only one realizing what you are realizing,

If you know what you feel is unique to you,

A whole new world becomes open to you,

Reality awakens from its coma and swallows you,

And in turn you turn your stone and you see everything,

Once you realize how small you are,

You are able to overcome your scars,

Yeah once you realize your just a wave,

You realize you are part of an ocean,

From your cradle to your grave….

 

So you only think what you want to think,

Think the most lovely thoughts,

And you only feel what you want to feel,

Feel empathy at all costs,

And you only hear what you want to hear,

Hear all of nature sing this song in harmony,

And when the waves of the world wash over you,

You will suddenly become everything….

 

You will be an ocean…..

Waves of change covering everything.

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